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Cry it out method - does it even work?

I’m having trouble embracing the CIO method with our 4-month-old. Both my mother and mother-in-law swear it’s the best way to get a baby to fall asleep faster and sleep through the night sooner. At this point, my husband and I are getting desperate for more sleep and I know our baby needs it, too. Is it really the best thing to do, or can it be stressful on the baby?

1 Like 10 Replies


Danielle posted September 25, 2019

After the three month-mark, give or take, it’s okay to let your baby cry it out. You don’t need to do this cold turkey or all at once. Just start reducing the time intervals at which you check in on her and don’t stay for too long each visit. Before you know it, the periods of crying before sleep will get shorter and shorter. The point is for your baby to learn to self-soothe. 1 Like

Madeline posted September 25, 2019

The CIO method can be tough to handle and it’s not right for every parent and baby. Research on this varies, but some experts think it can be bad for a baby’s psychological development and attachment. Don’t let your parents or in-laws dictate how you raise your child. If you can find alternative soothing methods that work better for you, use those. Lots of parents swear by calming music in the baby’s room. 0 Likes

Natalie posted September 25, 2019

Trust your instincts. Some parents blindly commit to the CIO method for their babies with an all or nothing approach. Parenting a newborn is not always black and white. Your baby may be crying excessively only because they are fussy and dependent on you to fall asleep, but they could have gas, digestive issues or something else going on that is causing the wailing. If this is the case, the method won’t work and you’ll both be fairly traumatized. Monitor the crying (noting when it’s worse, how often it happens, how long it lasts before sleep, how close it is to feeding time, etc.) and talk to your doctor to rule out other potential issues. 0 Likes

Jessica posted September 27, 2019

We actually did it with one of our kids and not the other. It definitely worked for one of our kids and the other was so adamant and cried for 7 days straight and each night the hours lasted longer of him crying that we just couldn't keep it up. Both of our kids sleep through the night now. I think in this case, do what's right for your family. 0 Likes

Leah posted September 29, 2019

The cry it out method is extreme for me. I had an active crying baby and it was extremely difficult. As a parent, you don't want to hear your baby crying, it's as though they are seeking attention for something that they can't yet vocally express through words. I chose to sooth, comfort, rock and hold. It took a toll on my rest, but it did eventually pass and you will have a full night's rest again. 0 Likes

Leonie posted October 8, 2019

So I’m very against CIO. Sadly most think it’s normal and okay but you can find a support group on fb called Beyond sleep training that will give you the support you need to be there for your baby. Please do what feels right to you, not what others think is right 0 Likes

Lillian posted October 10, 2019

The baby should be clean, well fed and warm. If you do this the baby should sleep comfortably all night. There are times when the baby has issues like teething. In these instances the baby may wake with discomfort and you can soothe it back to sleep. Don’t turn on lights, change or feed the baby or you will have a very alert baby ready for play. I don’t believe on letting anybody crying themself to sleep is good. You are teaching that crying is a form of communication, and that at your own will you will ignore the baby’s needs. 0 Likes

Daisha posted October 15, 2019

That do NOT work I tried it it just drives me crazy try this 1. Start off with a warm bottle 2.after the baby has been burped a warm bath 3. Lotion the baby down slowly with baby sensitive lavender lotion in the middle of the you find the baby falling to sleep and be sleep for a long while 5:30-6am a warm bottle again 0 Likes

Audrey posted January 7, 2020

I refused to do CIO, babies need us. We are their comfort. They just came into this world so I imagine it’s scary and new to them. Only thing that saved us was co sleeping 0 Likes

Crystal posted January 23, 2022

I held my daughter the moment she began to cry. every time. I held her while sleeping. I held her after diaper changes, bath time and feedings. I held her like this until she was 3.5. She responded beautifully. I did not use a binky. She could fall asleep easily on her own. She is well adjusted. She tells me im the best mom everyday. She says I love you, Mom at least 5x a day! We are very close. I still hold her today. Babies need the attention. Babies need the closeness. I would check food, bottle, clothes, diaper and room temperature every time there was a peep. I never let her cry or be uncomfortable. She was always clean and fed. I believe society tries to detatch and put a binky in too early. Babies need to be held and given unconditional attention. 0 Likes